Friday, December 23, 2011

Family Pics!

Dear Maizy,

I took Wednesday off work so that we could go get our family pictures taken and I must say they turned out pretty dang cute!!  You looked adorable as always.  You were a little tired, a little hungry and a little distracted by this lame little girl that's mom was not paying any attention to her and was trying to squeeze into our pictures.  That part of it drove me crazy.  The photographer would get you all positioned and then the little girl would walk over and you were ready to play, the girl's mom was oblivious. But all-in-all the pics turned out great. 

When I saw a preview of the pics, it brought tears to my eyes.  You are absolutely breathtaking!

See.............






After pictures we went next door for wings and beer.  Daddy's friend Josh is in town so he came along with us on our adventure.  I just love my days off and being with you.

We also have a cute little Christmas tree up too!  It's darling!!  You like to touch it, say "Christmas tree" and reorganize the ornaments.  I wish I didn't wait so long to put one up.

We are almost all done with our Christmas shopping and good thing since tomorrow is Christmas Eve.  We are giving most people pictures of us in nice frames for Christmas.  They are going to love them.  Your father and I bought you some cute things you'll like but we didn't go overboard since your Grandma's seem to do a good job of that. 

Tomorrow night is our annual Christmas Eve party with my Aunt JoLynne and my darling cousins.  This has been a tradition even before I was born and I look forward to it every single year!  I hope we do it forever!!!

Christmas morning we are waking up going to Grandma Annette's for homemade scones, then coming home and having dinner with Grandpa Frank, then we'll open our presents. 

Then Monday morning is a day most of us have off work, so we are going up to Grandma Shelly's for the day where you will get bombarded, no, seriously bombarded with gifts.  It's going to be a very wonderful, exciting and memorable Christmas.  The best gift of all though that I get now and forever is you as my daughter.  There's nothing better than that!

So right now you are screaming, screaming a lot!  When you are happy, excited, mad, sad - you belt it out!  You are continuing to talk a ton, running everywhere, into everything and not sleeping too well at night.  Last night you slept with me.  I don't mind except that I don't sleep!!  But I love to watch you sleep with your long, gorgeous eyelashes, watching you peacefully sleep and just wondering about what life God has planned for you, us as a family, then I really can't sleep just thinking about it all and taking it all in.

Merry Christmas Sweet Girl!  I hope you get everything you want.

I love you!!

Love,
mommy

Busy, busy, busy time of year!!

Dear Maizy,

This time of year is almost as busy as you!  There is SO much going on.  Family parties, too many goodies to eat, shopping, exchanging gifts, and all of this on top of the busy day-to-day stuff.  I always am saying to myself and people close to me "why can't life just slow down!?!  One minute for everything to just stop. Stop!!!" 

I am so sad to report, but we don't even have our Christmas tree up yet.  I know,  I know.  I was so hard pressed to get one up last year since it was your first Christmas and all, but this year just feels different.  There is no snow on the ground, we don't have any Christmas decorations up, I've had it with people, the shopping and the greediness that comes with it all.  Then I feel bad in the meantime, real bad, that you don't have a tree or decorations to even know that it's Christmas.  I feel bad because you are the only person I want to shop and buy for but with everyone else spoiling you I don't need to.  I am sad that only one person close to me has said "don't get me anything. I don't need anything."  (Here's where the complaining begins) I have to buy for your Grandparents and Great-Grandparents who all have everything their hearts desire and yet they have not said once to me "we don't need anything,"  and are instead telling me what to buy them, it makes me sick, downright sick when I think about it. 

This time of year needs to be focused on Christ, his birth, family, love and the things we do have. Not materialistic things, but things being our warm and loving home, our health, each other, jobs, insurance and love, lots of love.  I want to focus on all of these things.  I can't help but think the only way to avoid this is to boycott family. Sound nice, eh!?!

As a child me and your Aunt Brittany never wanted for anything, it was just given to us.  Everything and anything our heart desired.  When I think about it, it's kind of disgusting.  I was telling my mom, your Grandma, how spoiled we were and what an injustice that was to us.  She acted surprised and asked if I liked it, well yes of course I did then, but it has done me a great injustice.  I always just expected it.  I knew I'd get spoiled. I am still spoiled. I want to do the opposite for you. 

Here is what I want to do:
I want to give you the item you most want for Christmas - within reason of course.
Then I want to give you memories of us cooking, baking, singing Christmas songs together, sipping our hot chocolate with marshmallows while we chat, cuddling, watching our favorite Christmas movies together, going to visit and give to those less unfortunate.  I owe all of this to you.  I don't have any of this with my mom or Grandma and I have always longed for it.

I promise next year we will start our traditions together and building our memories.  This holiday season has kind of spun out of control for me.  Next year I will have it more together.

I love you!!

Love,
mom

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Crazy, crazy world!!

Dear Maizy,


We live in a crazy, crazy world!!  There are so many crazy, scary things that happen out there and I want to protect you from all of it.  If I could put you in a big bubble I would or better yet keep you in a tower of a castle and keep you from the outside world - you know Tangled style!?!?  But I can't.


Today after 9 long years the war in Iraq has been called to end today.  In the time that we were in Iraq 4,500 U.S. soldiers have died, 32,000 wounded and it has cost the U.S. more than $800,000,000,000.00 - that's $800 HUNDRED BILLION dollars!!  I don't have a big political stance but those numbers are outrageous and sickening.  I am happy to say that I am really, really glad that the war is over and families can be back together as so many men and women were away from their families for years, but now this opens a whole other can of worms which I won't go into now.  As a parent I just wish we lived in a much more peaceful, loving, beautiful, kind world.  There is all of those things somewhere, but you have to search for them or just look past all of the negative and see the good in everything. 


I was thinking about this the other day - why are parents and children's relationships strained during the teenage years?  And I think I know why.  I used to say to my parents all the time "You don't understand."  "You don't know how it is."  And even though our parents were teenagers at one point there is some truth to that.  The music has changed, school curriculum has changed, people change, the world has changed.


When  I was in high school it wasn't socially acceptable to be gay.  Although I had two gay best friends they didn't come out until after high school.  They lived in fear and couldn't be their true selves without being ridiculed, but I bet when you attend school you will have lots of gay or even transgendered friends, and this is ok of course, but that is something that I won't be able to fully relate with.  


Cell phones.  Oh gosh!  I don't even know what to think.  I didn't get my first cell phone until I was 19 years old, had a job and paid for it myself.  Then texting.  We didn't really text until I was like 25 years old and now that is all people do and it's sad.  People are rapidly losing their social skills, they text instead of call and communicate, they Facebook or email so that they don't have to talk.  People don't say "hi!", smile or make eye contact with one another anymore and it makes me sad!!   


I think I was born in the wrong decade.  I would LOVE to be an adult in the 50's, rocking out to Elvis, vacuuming my ranch style home in my poodle skirt and beautiful, lightly stained apron from all the homemade meals I've prepared, sipping on Martini's on the back porch every evening, calling my best friend who lives next door to talk about so-and-so's bad perm,  driving a '57 Chevy, go to the Nickelodeon to see James Dean and Marilyn Monroe on the big screen, not having to lock my doors at night, not having to worry about my children playing outside or even after dark for that matter.  Then you would be a teenager in the 70's and I would trade the world's influences and problems any day rather then today. 


Anyway, my point is I want to show you all the beauty and love in this world but am worried I won't be able to effectively do that because it seems so few and far between nowadays.  I want to teach you to love and accept everyone but how can I when so many people suck and are full of negativity and hate.  


I have concluded that I will do my best to teach you, protect you,  will give you all the love that I can and will always be here to support and love you.  Although I may not understand all the time I will try my best!  I love you so much sweet girl!


Happy 16 months!!  Best 16 months of my life.  


Love,
mom







Hey Girl!

Dear Maizy,

It's been a while since I've written, but truly know I think about it everyday!! These are the thougths that come across my mind.  What should I write? Oh I should write this? Don't forget to write this down!

Well where do I begin!?!  I will start by telling you that you are growing WAY too fast!  I see pictures of babies and it's hard for me to remember you being that small, but you were.  You were only 5 pounds when I brought you home.  I still thank God for giving and trusting me with such a beautiful, precious gift and that's what you are - a gift.  You are a gift from God to your father and I.  You have blessed our lives with so much.

The other day I was maybe in a morbid mood of sorts, but I was watching you as you were sleeping next to me and it hit me like a ton of bricks.  I would die for you!  I can't think of anyone or anything else in the world I would do that for, but you.  I would do anything for you.  I am sure and don't want to think that I'd ever have to make that decision but if so, know I got your back. ; )

I can't believe what a big girl you are becoming.  You are very independent and are continuing to be each day.  Here is all the stuff that you are up to:

  • You feed yourself and usually won't have it any other way.
  • You refuse to lie still while I change your diaper.
  • You like to eat your Desitin (diaper cream) out of the tube. Eeewwwww! I do hide it and put it out of reach but somehow you still manage to get it sometimes. 
  • You LOVE books!  You have been chucking them at me to read to you. You don't have to go to that extent as I enjoy it, but you sure know how to get my attention.
  • You say 20+ words and are saying new words each day.
  • You try to dress yourself - I would like to add that it's quite entertaining to watch.
  • You enjoy playing with your baby dolls - SO cute!
  • You and your dad wrestle and play tough - you LOVE it!!  Dads are good at this!
  • You brush your teeth pretty dang good all by yourself.
  • You brush your hair and others - you tried to brush your dad's friend's hair the other day!! Ha ha ha!  He does have rather long, blonde hair.
  • You are starting to get more cuddly!!  I LOVE it!  You won't kiss me, but you will give me hugs.  Hey, I'll take what I can get.
  • You LOVE Grandma Shelly and your Grandma Donker.  When they are around - I'm chopped liver.  I don't take offense.
  • Your sleep pattern has been super crazy lately!!  Someone told me that it could be a growth spurt that's causing this :(
  • You weigh 20 pounds!!!! You are 4 times your birth weight!!! AAAAHHHHHHH!
  • You clingy sometimes and I really like it.
  • You LOVE other kids.  When we see them out and about you just stand there, point and smile at them and say "baby!" It's super cute!!
  • You are so funny, beautiful and perfect.  
Thanks for being an amazing little 16 month old!!  16 months!?!  Can you believe it!?!





Love you tonz and tonz!!

Love,
mom

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Thank Goodness I Love You

Dear Maizy,

Lately you have been thinking that sleep is optional.  Well I every night/morning this week I have had to remind you that is not the case.  You have been waking up at 3:30am and just want to play.  That is just not conducive with my work schedule.  Thank goodness that you are super darling, cute, funny, amazing and that I love you!

You are such a good girl.  Your father and I talk about it all the time.  I am here to tell you in case it's not obvious why you are super amazing.  First of all, you were an easy delivery so right there I already love you for that.  You are beautiful inside and out.  You are funny. You are smart! You have compassion. You LOVE to learn.  You are patient.  You love animals.  You have the most gorgeous and contagious smile.  Beautiful eyelashes. Ok I could go on for days but hopefully you get the point.

Just as of late you learned the word "owie" and what it means.  If you have an "owie" you come up to me with your lips pouted and eyebrows low and your hand or where ever your hand is to kiss it better.  It makes my heart melt.

You are so dang smart and cute!!

Dad decided to try blow drying your hair.  You let him and it turned out awesome.

See...



Thank you for being so awesome.  I love you!!

Love,
mommy

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Thanksgiving Weekend

Dear Maizy,

Life has been crazy, busy and I feel bad that I haven't posted this sooner.  In my defense I did start writing it sooner - just haven't finished it for almost 2 weeks!

We had a wonderful Thanksgiving!  It was awesome and delicious.  Grab a drink and snack because it was a looooooong weekend.  Here's the low down.

Wednesday night when I got home from work you and I went grocery shopping and met Grandma at the store since I had her turkey - I bought it from some guy here at work.  Then when we left the store Grandma Shelly just happened to have the most darling Disney Princess chair.  She knew that it would keep you quite occupied while I started on my pies and your dad started on his rolls.  Boy was she right!  You love your new chair!



The house smelled fantastic from our awesome baking.  One out of three pies turned out ok.  I made one chocolate and attempted 2 banana cream pies.  Your dad's rolls turned out beautifully.  Your dad put the turkey in a brine.  We all stayed up until midnight playing, munching, cleaning, prepping and anxiously awaiting for the big Turkey Day.

Thursday morning arrived too soon and yet not soon enough. You slept while your father and I prepped all our ingredients.  I made my cornucopia salad while your dad made his herbed butter for the turkey,  I got the sweet potatoes ready, boiled potatoes, the turkey went in the oven and we cleaned and got the house ready for Grandpa Frank's arrival.  You woke up, we played and had a great time just being together.  You were such a huge help and such a big girl.  You entertained yourself while we prepped and got everything ready.  Thank you!  Thank you!  You could tell that you knew something was going on and was just waiting for the "big" moment!

The turkey came out of the oven to rest, you went down for a nap, the potatoes were mashed, the stuffing went in the oven along with the sweet potatoes topped with marshmallows.  Drink in hand!  Grandpa arrived.  We had chips, pretzels, a yummy homemade cheese ball and dip - thanks to your father the "culinary expert".  It was hard not devour those and save room for the feast.

At 3pm we were all ready to sit down and make our plates up and just then you woke up.  Right in  time for dinner. I went and got you out of bed, you saw the table all made up, Grandpa seated at the table and you knew this is what we had been preparing for.  You were all smiles.  You thoroughly enjoyed the turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy, rolls, cheeseball and actually it's just easier to say you loved everything, but the sweet potatoes.  We stuffed ourselves.  It was the tastiest Thanksgiving that I can recall. But Oh.My.Gosh.  It was SOOOO much work.  I was exhausted.  I didn't even bother dressing nice for dinner, putting on makeup or even doing my hair. 

I was so filled with love and thanks.  I loved being together, in our nice warm home, enjoying our bounty, full tummies and the house smelled so dang good.  You were so happy and smiley.  You love having new people to entertain.  Grandpa would just stare at your cuteness and comment on what a climber you are.  This we know.
Grandpa left about 6:30pm.  We were supposed to go up to Grandma Shelly's for dessert, but when I called luckily she let us off the hook, knew we were tired and we would hang out another day. Whew!  I didn't feel like leaving the house.   We just relaxed and dabbled in leftovers the rest of the evening.  It was a great, great night!

Friday arrived and we slept in.  Woo hoo!!  We just bummed around and played.   Since it was such a beautiful day we decided to run a few errands.  It wasn't as crazy as we expected.  I think all the shoppers were home and done for the day!  You fell asleep in the car, but woke up in time for us to run into K-Mart to get a few things.  Dad got a new pair of shoes, me some crayons, you two puzzles, coloring book and special crayons just for you!  Then we went home, colored, relaxed and did some puzzles.  Watched a couple movies.  Went to bed.  Our days together go by way too fast!!

Saturday daddy had to go to work and therefore he got out of cleaning the kitchen.  I cleaned the kitchen then Grandma came and got us and took us to her house.  We ate, played and played some more.  We had a great time at Grandma's house. You and I went to lay down and tried to get you a nap - that wasn't happening! You were tired!  Grandma and Grandpa took us home about 7ish around the same time that dad got home.  You and dad missed each other.  You played and then we went to bed!!

Sunday we just hung around, cleaned and played.  I love just being home with you and enjoying the time that we get to spend together.  I have been thinking about getting a second job and I can't help but think I'd rather be frugal then miss more time away from you.  I hope you'd feel the same way.

Love you sweet girl!

Love,
mom

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

List of Thanks

Dear Maizy,

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving and this is the time of year we think about all the things we are thankful for and give our thanks.  Here is my list of thanks.

You - for bringing so much love and joy to my life.  When I think about it I can't help but get teary eyed knowing how much God has blessed me. I Love You!

Your Dad - his kindness, love, knowledge, and patience have taught me so much.  I Love Him!

My Mom - she does SOOOOO much for our family.  She gives, gives and gives of herself, time and money without even thinking twice about it.  We would not be where we are without her.  Bless her.

My Grandma - she loves and cares about you so much.  She is always SO willing to watch over you when we work. I know you are in the best care possible when you're with her.  She bathes you, plays interactively with you, cuddles you, feeds you your favorite foods, she makes the most comfortable place for you to nap, washes your clothes when you're there, praises your every move, gloats over your beauty and knowledge.  We love her!


My job - it offers me the stability to provide for my family.  The insurance benefits are exceptional and for that I am thankful.

Our home - it's getting more and more comfortable.  It's warm, nice, affordable and it's full of love! I love watching how comfortable you are in our home and how you still find areas to explore.

Running Water - seriously though.  We are so lucky for warm running water.  I really appreciate it especially at your bath time.  I truly am a thankful mom for this.  You want your children to be happy, healthy and clean and this luxury provides it for us.

Freedom - the freedom to think, want, say whatever we as Americans want.  As a mother of a strong, young daughter I am assured that you may always be as independent as you desire and everything that you  strive for is at your finger tips - this is definitely something to be thankful for.

Internet - to be able to keep in touch with friends and family.  Share your pictures and my thoughts with you and be able to write a "blog", to have the ability right at my finger tips to look up anything I want to know is simply amazing.

Grocery Stores - to be able to walk into a clean facility that contains anything and everything my materialistic heart desires is a blessing. I know that people in other areas of the world don't have the luxury of experiencing.  If you're sick and you need medicine it's readily available, hungry - I can fix that too!! We are really quite lucky.

I believe our lists of things to be thankful for change each year.  I think back even 2 years ago how my list has changed dramatically.

I have so much to be thankful for and I am.  Having a family of my own is so amazing and I am so very thankful and blessed.  I have been humbled in so many ways.  I try to judge less and love more. Not sweat the small stuff and just take and enjoy life for what it is.

I can't wait to help you and read all of your "lists of thanks" each year.

Well tomorrow is Thanksgiving.  It's the first one where I get to stay home and prepare the dinner.  Your dad is in charge of the turkey, stuffing, gravy, mashed potatoes and I am in charge of the cornucopia salad, pies, appetizers and veggies.  Grandpa Frank is coming over to join us for dinner.  Then we are going up to Grandma Shelly's for dessert.  It's going to be a wonderful day and the best part about it is I get to spend time with my favorite people - you and your dad! 

Here's to many, many more Thanksgivings and memories.

Cheers!!

I love you!

Love,
mom

Can you believe this is you a year ago!?!?  Love you!

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Medically Confirmed

Dear Maizy,

Yesterday was your 15 month doctor appointment and it's been confirmed by a medical professional that you are smart, beautiful, witty and awesome!!

I took yesterday off for the event.  We woke up headed to the doctor's and she was running late.  45 minutes to be exact!!  We weighed you and you weigh 19 pounds and 10 ounces!!  WOW!!  You are still quite small for your age, but you're growing fast and catching up!!

The doctor finally made it to our room and had an intern with her this time.  The first thing the doctor said to the intern was "this 15 month old is not your typical 15 month old, she's more like a 20 month old!"  WOW!!  And boy is she right!!

We told the doctor all the things you say and do and you are way ahead of schedule PLUS you are very sociable which is not common among children your age. 

At one point you put your arms up for the doctor to hold you and she said "it's not me she wants, Maizy wants the stethoscope around my neck, she has motives, she is thinking and this is very typical of a 2 year old. See."  The doctor picked you up and your grabbed her stethoscope.  You my dear are very smart and tricky.

They took your measurements and your head circumference is in the 7th percentile while your height and weight is in the 44th percentile. 

After meeting with the doctor it was time to go get your immunizations.  Saddest thing for sure.  You had to get three shots - measles, chicken pox and hepatitis A - 2 in your left leg and one in your right.  Poor thing.  You cried so hard, it made me cry.  This was the worst round of shots so far.  On the way to the car you would think about it and get pissed off that it was still hurting I could just tell.  Then when we were in the car you kept crying and was grabbing at your legs and I don't think it helped that we were all starving!  We didn't anticipate the doctor taking so long.  Grandma to the rescue.  She also had the day off and was all ready to meet us at Mimi's Cafe for lunch.  Dad dropped us off while he went to work for a few, so we had a wonderful, well deserved lunch with Grandma.  Then we went to Target with Grandma for a few things and then she drove us home and dropped us off.  You slept in the car on the way home and that's all you slept. All day.  You had too much to do but I loved it because we spent all day together!! YAY!!

We played, we chased each other, we ate dinner, laughed and cuddled.  Then dad got home and we did all that all over again!!  You are such a delight!!  At one point the doctor said "don't you just enjoy her." And while the answer is "Yes! Yes! Yes!"  It's bigger than that.  We love you with all that we are.  You are a true delight in our lives.  We would do anything for you.  You add and bring so much to not only our lives but the rest of the family too!

You are a true blessing and we love you!

Love,
mommy

While at work I received this pic via text message.  Grandma Annette is watching you today.
Oh you girls!! 

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Mother's Know Best

Dear Maizy,

Our weekend has been amazing.  You are SO entertaining!!  Friday we all got home and played, it was a long week for all of us.  You went to Grandma Donker's Wednesday, Thursday and Friday while your dad worked.  We had to wake you up early every morning and it throws you completely off schedule, it makes me feel bad.  You and daddy missed each other.  Friday you were clinging on to him and touching his face while you two talked, it was adorable and heartfelt.

Saturday you and I went up to Grandma Shelly's while we got new tires on the car.  We got lunch at In-N-Out and ate it at Grandma's. Grandma and Grandpa Glen were getting a kick out of you. We hung out there for a few hours, got the car and came home.  You and daddy took naps while I cleaned my room.

My room was a mess with stuff that just needed to be put away.  I allowed it to be cluttery and messy until it finally got to me.  It only took 3 hours to make it spic-and-span.  I started thinking how important it is to clean your room.  Being organized and putting everything in it's place makes your days run smoother and therefore makes life easier, so clean your room!!! Keep it clean!!  My mom never made me clean my room growing up and she did me a HUGE injustice!!!!!  Cleaning and keeping your room clean, your "junk" to a minimum, clothes hung up and put away is one of the best things you can do for yourself.  It only took me 25+ years to figure this out.  Learn from me.  Mom's know best!!

Today your father, me and Grandma Annette dropped off and picked you up at Grandma Shelly's while we went and saw Twilight: Breaking Dawn - your dad likes the vampire movies.  It was a great movie and since your dad loved it I enjoyed it even more.  Well when we got to Grandma's to drop you off I noticed that I forgot to pack diapers!!! AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!  I felt so bad and to make matters worse Grandma Shelly was ticked off about it and wouldn't you know it you needed a diaper change 30 minutes after you were there!! I felt so bad, but Grandma made me feel even worse.  I really did feel bad.

Then after the movie we went and picked you up and Grandma rubbed it in again plus we forgot your bottle too, but I doubt you would have slept over there anyway.  It made me think that the reason they say Mother's Know Best is because they forget about all the stupid, forgetful crap they did, they would never admit it to their children and nor would they volunteer such information.  I KNOW for a fact that none of your Grandma's are perfect, but they did what they thought was best and they probably would like to forget the things they didn't do "right", so I decided not to let this one affect me and let it slide.  I mean I felt worse than anyone else could have made me feel. So yes, Mom's may know best, but if you ask them "Mom's Know Best and.................. it all - they just fail to leave this part out of the saying.

I would like to go down on the record for being the first mom to admit that I don't know best or all the answers like some mom's (grandma's claim), I'd like to think I do and the reason being is because I have done lots of stupid things in life and I don't want you to do the same and that my dear is why mom's think they know best. So from trial and error it's that we think we know best. Some mistakes are bigger and stupider than others, but if you listen to me I can help you avoid the negative consequences.  I will just have to tell you  the consequences of doing something stupid.  I will be honest with you and that is what most mom's (grandma's) don't do.  I love you and you deserve that from me.  I am going to break the chain in our family and will be an honest mom. I can go more in depth with this one when your older, but it's the least I can do being your mother.  I love you and want the best for you and have a pretty good idea I know best. ; )

Thank you for an amazing weekend.  I have tomorrow off from work to take you to your 15 month old well check visit - you have to get some shots - OUCH!!!!


I LOVE YOU!!!




Love,
mommy

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Maddie, Maizy, Maizy, Maddie

Dear Maizy,

Before you there was Maddie, my cat.  She was such a great companion. I couldn't wait for you and Maddie to meet.  I just knew that you two would like each other.  Well Maddie decided to pack her bags and runaway.  Never to be seen or heard from again. 

On Wednesday March 19, 2003 Grandpa and  I went to the Humane Society to find Grandpa a dog.  Well I decided to go check out the cats.  I was not planning on getting a cat that day - just looking.  Well I saw Maddie - her name at the shelter was Tiger Lily - in a cage and she was stretching out her paw at all the passerbys.  She had these gorgeous green eyes, a beautiful coat - it's what they call tortoise and was just a petite thing.

I asked to take her to a meeting room at the shelter where they take the animal out of their cage and you go in a little room to interact and get a feel for each other.  Once we were in the little room Maddie's personality exploded.  She was full of spunk and I had to have her.

Grandpa didn't find a dog but I found a cat.  YAY!!  I left her at Grandpa's while I ran to the store to get the basic necessities for her.  While I was at the store Grandpa called and asked how much longer I was going to be - Maddie pooped on the floor.  Ha ha ha!!

I took Maddie home to my apartment.  We have a very interesting relationship to say the least.  It was something we definitely had to work on.  Maddie had love/hate feelings towards me, she refused to cuddle and she wanted to go outside and play.  I was not a fan of that at all!! I lived in an apartment complex and didn't think she was safe BUT with her howling and pounding on the blinds with her paws until she got her way - she went outside.  She would be gone for hours at a time and some nights didn't even come home.  I missed her.  I longed for her to reciprocate those feelings towards me. 

One time during the winter months a neighbor brought Maddie to my door and threatened to call Animal Services and report me for animal abuse if she saw Maddie out during a winter evening ever again.  I was DEVASTATED!!!  I am a huge animal lover,  I would never cause any animal, let alone my pet that I love dearly any harm.  Maddie didn't want to come home ever and I felt powerless.

Her and I continued to work on our relationship.  I gave her the benefit of the doubt.  Someone else had raised her and there she was at the shelter, so who knows if she was neglected, physically hurt but obviously she had some trust issues.  Our relationship was built on mutual trust.  I showed her that I loved her unconditionally, I provided her with a home, safety, food and water.  It took a long time but her and I became the best of friends and I love her very, very much.

When I started dating your dad she did not like him at all.  It saddened him I think since Maddie and I loved each other so much.  I am not sure why she didn't like him, but when we started hanging out Maddie would come home less and less and I would have to go searching for her. 

When I found out I was pregnant I was SO excited to have you two meet and have you grow up with this awesome cat!  But I think she may have known I was expecting - they say animals can sense it - and maybe didn't like the unexpected. 

Maddie left the house on Tuesday March 9, 2010 just shy of 7 years of us being together and never returned.  I was devastated.  I searched and searched for Maddie.  I posted signs everywhere.  I would yell for her all hours of the evenings. I was sad.  I am still sad over it.  I miss her.  I am sad that you two have never met. 

I know that you will have great  childhood pets that will forever have a place in your heart.  I also had a dog named Scooter that we had for 14 years!!  Yes, 14 years, but we'll talk about him another day.

 I like to think that Maddie moved somewhere warm and sunny, resides by a swimming pool, chases all the birds she wants to her heart's content and thinks about me at least once in a while.  I am sure her new owner loves her almost as much as I did and continue to.

Check out how adorable, comical and full of life Maddie was.  She rocked. 









Love you Maddie.

Love you Maizy.

Love,
mommy

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

15 Months Old!

Dear Maizy,

You are 15 months old today (well yesterday)!!  Crazy how time flies, it actually makes me really sad.  I wish I could hit the "pause" button and make life  slow down. just.for.one.minute. 

We had a fabulous weekend together.  Friday I got home from work and we went to Wal-Mart to do some much needed shopping.  You don't like to sit in the cart like most children, you prefer to stand up in the cart, wave to people, reach out for things and grab random things to put in the cart.  Tonz of people would smile and wave at you, comment on how beautiful you are and I know you brightened some sad people's evening for sure.  I mean we were at Wal-mart on a Friday night.

We were at Wal-Mart longer than any other person should be.  We were all starving so we stopped at Atlantis burger for salad and sandwiches on our way home.  Then you and I went and played in your room before bed time. You are so fun to watch and play with.

Saturday we woke up, dad fixed us breakfast and we got busy making a birthday cake for Christian's birthday.  We were pretty pleased with the way it turned out.  Then you decided to take a nap around the time that we should have been leaving for the party.  Yikes!



We finally arrived at the party and you were SO cute!  It had been a year since some of the party guests had seen you and they were getting quite a kick out of how much you've grown and how dang cute you are!?!  You kept wanting Sara's sister-in-law, Afton, to hold you.  You are always attracted to pretty people, she is pretty.  She held and carried you around.  All the kids were playing in the bedroom and you would go in there once in a while to check out the action.  All the kids were so cute and shared their candy with you.  I love watching you interact with other kids. 

There was a baby at the party that you were fascinated by, but you kept patting her little chest and it was freaking me out.  I remember when you were a baby and kids would do that to you and I didn't like it.  You are quite fascinated with babies, it's adorable!  When at the store we walk down the doll aisle.  I LOVE hearing you say "baby" at all the dolls as you point them out.  You also point them out on the diaper boxes too, so freakin' cute!!  I love your sweet little voice.

After the party we headed up to Grandma's house for dinner.  Brittany and Patrick were there too!  It was a lot of fun.  Grandma and Brittany took turns reading you stories.  You were also quite entertaining with your stepping stool - turning it upside down and sitting in it. 

Sunday we slept in until 10:45am!  You're the best.  Got ready for the day.  I dropped you off at Grandma Donker's and I headed to a friends house to work on some Christmas crafts.  I missed you dearly, but you played and played at Grandma's and had a ball!!

Thanks for the awesome weekend!!  15 months already!?!?!  Where did the time go.

Love you!!

Love,
mom

Friday, November 11, 2011

This and that.

Dear Maizy,

I took the day off work yesterday.  We were getting our new furniture delivered and I couldn't bare the thought of being at work while you and your dad got to indulge in the new couches with out me.  Well the furniture arrived all too early - they were delivered, set up and delivery guys out of the door by 8:10am - no sleeping in for me on my day off.

I was bummed that we didn't get to sleep in, but the good thing is we had our whole day to play and do whatever we want without having to wait around to get our day started. 

We moved the old couch into the kitchen temporarily.  You did not like this change.  You took your cell phone and went and sat on the couch in the kitchen.  Not sure who you called or what you were saying, but I don't think you were diggin' the new couches.

We got ready for the day and were out of the door by 11am.  We went to look for new curtains, shoes for your dad and stuff for the house.  We went to Ross, TJ Max, Shopko, Wal-Mart and Target!  You were awesome in all of these stores!!  You did however like to take your shoes and socks off in the car of each store.  Eventually we just put your shoes in my purse and let you wear your socks everywhere!

Then we went to The Pizza Factory for lunch, it was yummy!!  You did pretty good with no nap.  In fact, you did great!!  I just love you and your face.

I just love the time that I get to spend with you and appreciate you so much.  You are this tiny little thing but you are so big at the same time.  You have big beautiful eyes full of curiosity, a smile that brightens the day,  the cutest little/big voice, a strong personality that I love,  I beg for your kisses - you're very choosy about giving them,  I die for your hugs - they are few and far between.  Not that you're not full of love but you are just too busy!!

I want to end with my favorite scripture. 

You are fearfully and wonderfully made. - Psalm 139:14



I love you!!!

Love,
mom

Tent City

Dear Maizy,

Look at what your Grandma Shelly gave you!!


She brought this to our house Tuesday night before us girls left for cousin Liz's going away party.  Can you believe this thing!?!?  Your dad blew it up for you and filled it with 50 pink and purple balls that came with it.  You got the biggest kick out of this thing!

We had to leave for the party then when we came back around 9:30pm you had a burst of energy and played and played in this thing.  Ok we did too!!  It was a blast to watch you play and press your cute face up to the windows on the side.  Cute, cute, cute!!



Then you did the cutest thing ever!!  There are the Disney princesses on each of the corners of the "tent" and they are about your size - you started talking to them!!  It was SOOOOO cute.  I couldn't understand what you were saying, but it was darling.  Tangled is one of the princesses on it along with Belle, Cinderella and Snow White.  Too Cute!!  Thanks Grandma Shelly

Love you!!

Love,
mom

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Monday Night Family Night

Dear Maizy,

I got home from work last night and surprised you as you were watching Tangled in our bed.  We cuddled for a minute while your dad was getting ready for the evening and Grandma was on her way to get us for dinner. Grandma called to tell me she was on her way and you wanted my cell phone after the conversation.  I gave it to you and a few minutes later you gave it right back to me - by dropping it on my lip while I was lying down!!!  It hurt SOOOO freakin bad and instantly I had a fat, purple lip - just in time for dinner!!  OUCH!!  I know it was a complete accident, but it stung with pain as I felt my lip getting bigger.  My eyes instantly started watering profusely too! 

Nothing that some good beer with dinner couldn't fix.  Anyway, Grandma arrived and we went to Red Rock downtown for dinner.  You looked absolutely darling in your brown sweater dress, tights and boots!!  You are SO dang cute.  You were just looking around at all the hustle and bustle.  Then you got bored with that, so Grandma gave you a pen and paper, then you got bored with that and played with Grandma's cell phone, then you got bored with that and luckily your dinner, cheese pizza, arrived!! 

We had a great night, ate some yummy food and were entertained by you! Thank you for being such a good girl when we go out.  Grandma was getting the biggest kick out of you!

Then we went back to our house, played with Grandma for a few then it was bed time.

It was a great night.

Luckily, my fat lip isn't so fat today.

Love you!!!

Love,
mom

Our weekend.

Dear Maizy,

We had another successful, fun weekend!  I never doubt that we will, but I am here to tell you all about it.  Friday night I got home and we played and played and played. 

Saturday I woke up to the power being out and it SNOWED!  I was supposed to go to a seminar but with the power being out and snow on the ground -  what better excuse than to stay warm in bed!?!?  The power came on about an hour later.  The baby monitor was plugged in so when it came back on I heard you in your room blabbin' away.  I LOVE listening to you talk to yourself in your room, then I like to sneakily open your door and spy on you. Sometimes you are lying there with your toes in the air trying to touch them, sometimes you are talking to your bear and pointing to it's facial features, sometimes you are screaming for someone to come in and get you!  This particular morning you were playing with a balloon that was near your crib - would you believe we've had this same balloon going on two months now - crazy huh!?!  I know, I know having a balloon near your crib is not safe, but when we put you to bed it was floating on the ceiling.  Please don't call the authorities. ; )
Anyway, you squealed when you noticed me spying.  I picked you up, we chatted as we walked down the stairs.  I got coffee for me and toast and jam for you.  You are always in the best moods in the mornings. I LOVE it!!  Well I knew that giving you yummy jam for breakfast would require a bath right away.  After breakfast you got in the tub, played and played then we got ready for the day! We decided that while the sun was out and it was a beautiful day we'd run some errands.

I opened the door and showed you the snow I had in my hand - you grabbed it out of my hand and ATE it!  I don't blame you, so I ate some too!  Didn't seem to taste as I remembered like it did 25+ years ago.

Well we got you all bundled up and ran our errands.  See.......




You pretty much fell asleep as soon as we pulled out of the driveway.  I went to a few shops while dad stayed in the car with you.  You slept for a good hour and most likely would have slept longer if I didn't zoom over a speed bump that woke you up - sorry about that! I did feel really bad, but you were happy, smiling and just happy to be out and about.

Then we got home.  You grabbed an apple that was sitting on the table and started eating it.  I could see that the skin of the apple was tough for you to eat, so I peeled it for you.  It was so cute to watch you eat this big apple!  You were loving it.  Loving it so much that you decided to rub the apple in your hair and all over your face.  Bath time!  It was your second bath for the day!!  You crack me up!

You love the bath.  You like to lay on your tummy in the bath and lean back and put your head in the water.  I like bath time more now that you are bigger and more durable!!  It was so scary when you were little, had soap on your little body and was so slippery.  Bath time would give me slight heart attacks when you were a wee little baby!


After bath time and getting you dressed in comfy warm clothes we just stayed warm and inside the rest of the day!  Grandma came over around 9pm to give us some chili that Grandpa Glen made - yummy!  We played in your room and Grandma helped me get you ready for bed. 

Sunday we woke up, had breakfast and played.  Grandpa Frank came over around 12:30pm and I have never, ever seen you SO shy.  You were holding on to me and burying your head in my chest.  You were walking around and covering your face.  We were cracking us up!!  Your father and I had never seen you act like that.  I had such mixed emotions - I liked that you were being shy because you were cuddling with me which you don't like to do near enough in my book, but I felt bad that you don't see your Grandpa enough - um, I've seen you friendlier with strangers.  Grandpa brought you some yummy fruit bars, so you and Grandpa had one while we chatted and played.  You eventually warmed up to Grandpa..............as he was leaving.  He needs to come around more - what do you think!?!

After Grandpa left you took a long overdue nap,  I finished my book and your dad watched football, it was a fantastic, quiet, relaxing Sunday.

Our weekends always go by SOOOOO fast!!!  Thanks for the awesome weekend and for being such a good girl!

I love you!!
Love,
mommy

Friday, November 4, 2011

Trust.

Dear Maizy,

Before I was expecting you I was always torn on becoming a mother.  It was a role I was so hot and cold about, off and on, positive and negative, let's just say I was all over the map about being a person's mom.  I mean it's a HUGE job and responsibility!  I am not sure everyone or anyone I know for that matter thinks like I do - that could be good and bad.  Good because I over analyze to much stuff too often and put a lot of thought into some things. Bad because some women become mom's because that's what "women do" and they may not want it or even strive to be good at it.  I want to be a mom, a good one.

I think about this quote often:

 Making the decision to have a child is momentous.  It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. - Elizabeth Stone

Anyway,  I remember talking to my co-worker years ago.  This co-worker was not just not anyone, it happened to be Branden Campbell, vocals and bass guitarist for the band The Neon Trees, we used to work together before he was famous, ok anyway, we were talking about kids and he said that being a parent was the coolest thing ever.  Then he told me this and it has always stuck with me - "Your kids just have so much trust in you.  My daughter Katie was standing up on something and said "dad, catch me!" and just jumped right to me trusting that I would catch her. I just thought that was really cool."  And I did too.  I never forgot that simple little story.  You trust that I will be there to "catch you."

You trust me.  You have too. I take you trusting me with all that I am.  I do my best to make the best decisions for you every single day.  I have to make sure I buy the best diapers,  the most nutritional and yummy food for you,  the right clothes and shoes, the best doctor, medicine, provide you with a safe and clean home, make sure you have clean clothes, towels and bedding and that is just some of the things I (we as parents) do.  I love doing all of these things for you, but it's not just me, it's your father too.  I honestly don't know what we would do without him.  You truly have an amazing father!

We love you so much and take such pride in you, our home, each other and being your parents.  You make me proud every minute of every day.

Last night I was giving you a bath and you trusted me to lie you back in the water and hold on to you.  You loved it!  You put your head back in the water, was closing your eyes and kicking your legs.  I was slowly pouring water on your tummy and we were humming a little song.  I would try to sit you up, but you were totally relaxed and wanted to continue lying back in the water.  I will always cherish that moment. 

I feel bad when I think of other children that don't have a chance and aren't given one from the very moment they are born. I seriously get so mad when parents take their children for granted and neglect them.  UGH!  I never want to take you for granted.  You are a special, special child.

Anyway, last night after our awesome bath time.  I got you in your jammies and we played in your room.  You were climbing from the ottoman (which rocks) to your rocking chair. Dangerous!  You were having a blast!!  You are such a little climber.  I love watching you play and giggle. 

Look how happy you were with yourself.




You were smiling and having a blast.  Then you saw the camera and gave me your serious face.
Then you got bored with the chair and found a basket to climb into.  You crack me up!


Thank you for trusting me.  I love you!  I am truly blessed to be your mother. It's Friday and I CAN NOT wait for the weekend.  I LOVE our weekends!!

Love you!!

Love,
mommy

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Stuff

Dear Maizy,

I can't get over how smart, fun and just downright awesome you are.  When I was expecting you people always told me "Oh you're going to be so tired!"  "You know she is going to be a teenager one day, right." "You'll never be able to do what you want anymore." They never told me all the good stuff.  It's like it was a secret or something. 

Well these things are true and they aren't.  I have and always will be tired.  When do we really get enough sleep.  Even on nights when you go to bed and I could potentially go to bed too - I don't.  So it's not always your fault I am tired.

You will be a teenager one day and I will patiently await those days.  I just hope that  we have a good relationship and respect for each other.  That we can communicate. That you ask and tell me lots of stuff.  That may be in a perfect world, but I am really hoping that is the case.  I always want to know what is going on with you, how you are feeling and I want to be right there supporting you and hopefully making life as a teen better and not worse.  There was NO communication between my parents and I and I don't want that for us.  Please!?!

People are right I can't just do whatever I want, whenever I want and that is fine by me.   I was sick of always thinking about me.  I had been doing that for way too long.  I love the spontaneity that you bring to my life.  Sometimes we read books all night,  play dolls, watch a movie, play music, dance, draw and sometimes you don't even want anything to do with me at all, but I love every minute of it because it's all you.  I love watching you play and interact with your father, me, other people and your toys.

Being your mom is the best thing by far I have ever done.  I get so excited for the person that you are and for the person you will continue to be. 

I've only known you for over a year - two if you count when you were in my tummy, but look how much you have changed.
Taken 11.2.10

Not only physically but mentally as well.  You have doubled - plus some in size,  you have lots more hair,  you now run, talk, giggle a ton more, play with toys all your own, feed your self, ask for stuff when you want it and your ability to understand is remarkable.  Can you believe this picture was taken exactly one year ago today!?!?

You have this cute little comb and brush set and I'll say "Go find your brush, go find it."  And there you go looking around the room and you always find it.  You'll brush your hair, your dolly's then mine.  I love when you brush my hair and you talk while doing it. 

The funniest thing - the other night you were brushing my hair and I turned my head to talk to your dad and you pulled my hair to put my head looking forward again.  You were like a mean hair dresser!  I got the biggest kick out of it. 

You know the word for most of your body parts.  We'll say "where are your toes?" And you'll touch them or put them in my face, "where is your belly?" And you'll pat your belly or ours.  "Where is your eye?"  You'll point to yours or put your finger into ours.  It's just amazing.

I am truly blessed to have you as my daughter.  You are smart, you are kind, you are important, you are beautiful, you are funny, you are mine.

I Love You!

Love,
mommy

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Happy Halloween!!!

Dear Maizy,

We survived Halloween!!  Whew!!  My day began at work. Boo! We had a Chili Cook Off here. Your dad and I both entered a crock pot of chili and wouldn't you know it.  Dad WON!!!!!  YAY!!!  Your dad took first place.  His chili really was quite delicious.  It had lots of flavor and color and just the right amount of spice - Yum!  Since he took first place he received a $25 gift card to a steak house.  Go Daddy! 

Then later in the afternoon the employees children came to my office for trick-or-treating.  I couldn't wait to see you!!! I was SO excited.  Everyone kept asking where you were.  I was getting anxious.  I kept calling and your dad didn't answer the phone and then when I called at 4:20pm you two were just barely leaving the house!  I was so, so sad!  The event ended at 5pm and when you got here everyone was pretty much gone. I admit when you and your dad got here I cried I was so sad.  Well we walked around anyway and about 5 people saw you, but 5 very luck y people.  I was bummed and still am when I think about it.  You weren't your usual happy self and it could have been because A) I cried and maybe the running mascara on my face threw you for a loop.  B) You just woke up and was trying to take it all in and figure it out. C) YOu were actually given candy and mommy and daddy let you keep it! Weird!





Anyway, after work we drove up to Grandma Donker's house for pizza and salad - not to mention they ordered my least favorite pizza IN THE WORLD!  UGH!  Not much besides my fave park ranger was making me to happy!  Anyway, everyone was excited to see you and Grandma Donker got you a cute little Halloween gift.  A Dora the Explorer card,  a plastic pumpkin and inside were 3 beanie babies, a darling outfit and 2 new books!! It was really nice of her.  Your dad and I also got you a Dora the Explorer Halloween dvd, but we gave that to you a day early!

Then after dinner we watched you run around and play.  You were cracking us all up. Then before we left I let you eat a mini Halloween cupcake.  It has bright orange frosting with black sprinkles. You ate it all up - it was really, really cute!! Dangit!  I didn't get a pic of that.  Needless to say with all that sugar you were up until 1:30am.

Thank you for the wonderful Halloween!! You had the most darling costume EVER!!  The cutest part of it all was your smile of course.  Thank you for being such a good, good girl! 

Love you tonz and tonz!

Love,
mommy